Macie is One!

So on the 7th we had a rip-roaring, good ole' western birthday for our little one. It was so much fun, really made possible by me relinquishing control and letting people help me. I did so much pre-planning that when it came to that day I thought everything would go smoothly. And it did. But really because DH's family was there to help out and it seemed to be fun for everyone.

We were at a local park where we go frequently for walks in our neighboorhood. Very nice.

We had hamburgers, chips, dip, watermelon, ice tea and coca cola in bottles. Nothing says 'western' to me like drinking coke from a bottle (which I didn't do because of course I'm still dieting and while I have been hugely successful, I still am ...well, slightly huge. Ha!) My dad's parents were able to be there as well as my mothers' mom. We surprised my mom by flying her mom and sister in for the day (and because the next day was mothers day).

There was a pinata filled with candy.

We had stick horse races, but the dad's ended up helping out. There weren't a TON of kids, so we got the dad's involved. Notice Macie in the corner. All she wanted to do was collect the cones.

She's on her way. Don't know where, but she's got a balloon. What more does a 1 year old need?
Then there was the cake. I couldn't decide what to do, but with about 40 people, I knew I needed a lot of it. So I just stuck with a half-sheet and a 9x13 on top. I'm not gonna lie, I was really proud of how it turned out. My Grandmother taught me how to do cakes a few years ago (I think learning to sew would've been better for my waistline though). Here is me at home working on it the night before.

Dh took care of Macie most of the night because it took me a while. As in 3 hours just to decorate. I'm hoping in the future to get faster at it (that doesn't include cooking time. I baked it and put it in the freezer a few days earlier.) It was a success! Thank you GG!I was just gonna have a piece of cake for macie and not a separate 'smash' cake, but I had made an extra square of cake to perhaps make a 3rd layer, but I didn't, so I just decided to make a little one. I didn't apparently get a great picture of it. It says "Macie Smash!"
She was completely into the cake.
She cried when my mom took it away. She probably would've eating the whole thing if I'd let her (where did she get that from? ha!)

Macie, you are a doll and I love you more than I ever thought possible. I can't wait for lots more birthdays together!

Peak and Pit

Peak:
This week the peak had to be last Saturday, because my baby girl turned 1!
There are about 500 pictures I have to go through before I can even begin to post them, so I'll try to get to that later. We had a blast, it was a cowgirl theme, and the girl loved her cake (was there any doubt?). There were all kinds of surprises and it was a terrific day. I also realized how much better things are if I let people help me instead of trying to micro-manage every part of a party. Bring on the help!
Pit:
Our girl had her Dr. appt. yesterday for her 12 month/1 year visit. While everything was great, I, er, she had to endure five shots! And we were told she could have a reaction up to 5 days later! So now comes the point of just watching her and making sure she is in tip top shape. She's also busting through her first molar, so that could cause a cranky child as well. Boo.

Her 12 month stats are:
Height: 31 1/4 inches (almost 10 inches in one year! Could you imagine if adults still grew that much!?) - 95th %
Weight: 24 lbs, 5 oz. 9th%
Head: 95th%

Did I mention our girl is not small? She's got most of the milestones reached, except she's not saying mama and dada yet. She says mamamammamam and Dadadadadada, but she hasn't quite said them to us. She knows what they mean, but she just hasn't spoken them. I'm wondering if the multiple languages is affecting that. I just mean that DH is teaching her spanish, I'm teaching her English, and we all teaching her baby sign language. I think it's just a lot for her to process. When did your little one's start saying mama and dada?

AND
How was your week this week? What was the 'peak' and 'pit'?

Trying

Okay, so I'm ready to try.
I'm ready to TRY to have a second baby.
It hasn't been as fast of a desire as I thought it would be. I thought I would LOVE to be PG again right away. Until I realized how tired a baby can make you. And how I keep hearing that going from 1 to 2 children is harder than 0 to 1! (do you guys agree? Input please!)

So this month we are officially trying. And I have lots of thoughts about that which I'm sure will be a few more posts (you're welcome), but my first thought is kind of weird and it's about bd-ing: baby dancing (that's se.x for those of you who are new to the lingo).

Before we got pregnant with Macie, our pastor was preaching on marriage and how important se.x is. How it is a great temptation to do it before you get marriage, but a greater temptation NOT to after you're married. So he challenged the congregation to have se.x every single day for a week.
At the time we were going through treatments, and AF was in town, so we just didn't. And I have always remembered that we didn't.
THEN, partner that with bd-ing. Does se.x equal a baby? We did get pg last month (and lost it) so maybe it's possible that we can be successful.

Does anyone see where I'm going with this?
DH and I talked about this last night and he is on board (not a surprise), and from this Sunday to next Sunday we're going to be intimate every day. It's two fold. I think it'll be good for our marriage and...maybe, just maybe... God will choose this to be the time to get PG with another baby.

Anywho, when we first were trying, a number of people said, "just have se.x every day for the whole month". And we never did. So my next thought is, did you? You don't have to describe it, but I'm curious if I'm the only one who never did every day. The Dr.'s suggested every other day, and we did that, but not every day.

And my next idea...is let me challenge you girls to do the same! I'd love to know if any of you want to try. It's like national 'work on your marriage week! I think our husbands would love it. But, make sure your husband knows that it's not just his week to get lucky. The husbands need to make sure the wives are in the mood, and help out around the house so the women can have a chance to enjoy the se.x, not just check it off the list.

Controversy! I want to know your thoughts!

Edited to add: The pastor challenged the Married Couples to do it. If you're single, probably having se.x 7 days in a row might not be the best idea a pastor ever had. Funny.

Chromosomes

My friend R. is going through IVF. She has been through it before. Her story is that she started TTC the same time I did. She got pg one year into the process and lost the baby at 6 weeks. She and her husband continued to try on their own. After 2 years I started seeing the RE and a year and half later we became pregnant with Macie.
R. and her husband started using the same RE just a year after we did. They did the whole spectrum of testing, and IUI, and injectables and everything. The ended up doing IVF last summer and it worked, they got pg! Then at 8 weeks, at the regular ob they found that the baby had stopped growing. So a D & C for her.
They decided to save their money for another cycle and just test the heck out of the embryo's to see what's been going on. Just last week they retrieved 10 Oocytes and 8 fertilized. Only two embryo's had the right chromosomes.
This has blown my mind. Out of 10 eggs, only 2 were 'right'. I put 'right' in quote because God doesn't make mistakes, but the ones that add up are scarce. Now R. is 38 years old. When her husband asked the Dr. if this was normal, he said it is normal for someone her age.

This scares me.
Does this mean that for all of us who are not doing genetic testing, we really don't know what could happen? I used to think that for every embryo that was growing, there was a chance for a healthy baby. But that is just not the case. How many times did I wonder why it took 5 embryo's for us to achieve one baby? And what about the recent miscarriage? Does that mean that baby wasn't 'right'? Probably.

I just hadn't previously considered that there could be so many genetic questions.
Have any of you done genetic testing? Were your numbers similar to R.'s? Or what are your thoughts?

And even more, how on earth do celebrities (minus Celine Dion) make it look so easy? I'm a huge Tina F.ey fan. And here she is, expecting #2 at age 40. (at least 40). But it's just not that easy.

Pit and Peak

Peak:
I have so many this week! My first peak is that my baby is about to turn a year old! Next Saturday she'll be 1! I'm planning a lovely Cowgirl themed party (any suggestions about cutesie names for food are welcome - ex: Cowgirl Chips for chips) and almost everyone we invited is coming, which is kind of scary.
Another peak also involves my little one. She learned how to 'tickle' me this week. I put it in quotes because she just mostly says a high pitched shriek that I know (mother's intuition) is her trying to say 'tickle' and then she squeezes her hands in my face like she's making the milk sign. But I'm positive she's trying to 'tickle' me. DH saw the whole thing again last night and he was cracking up that she can do that.
Pit:
At work we're starting AP (Advanced Placement) and IB (International Baccalaureate) testing. Usually this is a great time of year, but it means that I have to move classrooms so they can break down the wall between my classroom and the teacher next door. So before the end of the day I have to pack up everything I think I might need for the next two weeks because my room will be inaccessible (the walls will be stacked up against my shelves and drawers). So it's not the worst thing in the world, but it's a pretty big inconvience.

What was your pit and peak this week?

When to Proceed

In light of our recent loss, I am in a quandry about when to use our frozen embryo's. I don't want to wait too long, but I also am thinking, what if we were able to get pregnant on our own! I feel so encouraged by this recent pregnancy, even if it didn't stick, that I keep thinking maybe it'll just happen. This is how I felt for the first year and a half that we were trying to get PG, but in all that time I had never seen a positive. Then we tried for another year and a half before we were successful.
And then came Macie. She is just the best, most good-natured baby. I had a great weekend with her. We had fun and Easter was great.
And while I'm not complaining, it's just that I have a desire to make Macie into a big sister. So then the question becomes: When?
Do we aim for August? As a teacher, that would be the most ideal time. Or should we try longer? We're not even offically trying now, but of course you all know what that means. It still means hoping and all that jazz.
The other factor is that I have lost about 39 pounds since Jan. 2nd (horray!), but I still have much to loose. I'm beyond the baby weight, but the 3 years of trying did nothing good for my waste-line. It wasn't the IVF, it was all the months of thinking 'maybe I'm pg! I should eat for the good of the baby!'.
So I am stuck. When is the 'right' time to have a baby. If there is something I have learned from infertility is that I have NO control over when I will have a baby. So why am I even asking myself when?
Do any of you have any insight to share? Either your own experiences or friends?

Happy What?

This Friday is Good Friday.
This Friday is Earth Day.

Isn't it interesting (and sad) that I have seen nothing in the media about Good Friday. And the graphic we have for Easter on our weather station is a bunny.
Does anyone remember what it is we're celebrating? The bunny and eggs are a sign of Spring, and God created seasons, so I'm not anti-bunny. God created the Earth, so Earth day is great. But I need to talk about my Savior. Jesus was killed so that you and I could be free. But our society has gone so far away from these truths because it's not an easy topic to discuss. It's really difficult for the self made man (or woman) to accept that they're lacking in anything.
But we are.
So instead of filling the hole in our hearts with the love of Christ, we fill it with taking care of the earth. We fill it with good causes, but not things that cause us to draw closer to God. I want society to remember the gift that is free. And that is what the Easter season is about. Not bunnies, not Earth day, but the free gift of Grace given by God through Jesus.

So not happy Earth day.
Not happy bunny day.

Happy Easter ladies. Glory to God.